Remembering Memories

"We do not remember days, we remember memories." - Cesare Pavese (The Burning Brand)

Random memories ...

Some people say you can't remember things from before you were 4yrs old. Well I remember something from when I was 2yrs old. Growing up I would have these "flash backs" sometimes of me, as a little girl, hiding in the bathroom behind the door. I remember something "stinky" and remember feeling afraid and hearing my grandma call my name over and over... so, I asked my grandma about it one day. I told her about my "flash backs" and she started laughing. She told me that I was about 2yrs old that day. She remembered it well b/c she was watching me that day. Apparently, I was in the potty training stage and had my panties full of poop. I had taken it and smeared it on windows and doors. So that explains my feeling afraid and why I was hiding and why I remember something "stinky" LOL

I remember when I first started taking notice to differences in people of different races. My mother had a tubberware party and had her friends over. The tubberware lady was a black lady. I remember her being really nice and I felt comfortable with her. So, I innocently asked her why were her lips so much bigger than mine. I remember the look on my mothers face and you would think she wanted to die. She apologized to the woman for my question and the woman told her that it was fine. Then she looked at me and told me that her lips were bigger then mine for a few reasons. One being that she was older so everything on her was bigger. Two, that God, for some reason in all His wisdom, decided that folks of darker color should have bigger lips and that God made everyone special and perfect in his eyes. I had said I wished God gave me big lips because hers were pretty. She told me that God made me just as I am suppose to be and that I should love it no matter what. I remember that was my first "discussion" about God.

One memory that really sticks out from my teens has to do with my husband. We had known each other for about a month and had been "dating" for about 2 weeks. He would come over every day after football practice to visit with me. One day we were leaving my house, I think we were taking a walk or something, not sure, and he was in front of me. He was taller than me and he stopped on the step right below me on the porch. He turned around so that we were face to face, eye to eye. He looked at me with such sincerity and with so much certainty he said, "I'm gonna marry you." I told him, "You don't even know me." He said, "I know enough to know I love you and I'm gonna marry you."... and then he gave me a sweet, gentle kiss. ((And now look at us, 15yrs later with 3 kids lol))

What are some memories you have that brings a smile to your face?

Sugar & Spice..remembering some of my childhood

We all know that cute little saying about girls...

"Sugar and spice
and everything nice
that's what little girls are made of

Sunshine and rainbows
and ribbons for hair bows
that's what little girls are made of

Tea parties, laces
and baby doll faces
that's what little girls are made of"

Growing up, I was NEVER a "sugar & spice" girl. As a matter of fact, I hated dresses and cute little bows in my hair. I never did tea parties. I loved little dolls though.

I was a little "tomboy". I was the girl playing in the creek with my friends (who were mainly boys) and catching bull frogs and tad poles.... playing in the "gunky" end of the lake, putting worms on hooks and catching "Sunnies" only to pull them off the hook and throw them back in... I was the little girl always running around barefoot with feet blacker than a sky with no stars at night!

We had these huge dirt hills at the edge of the woods that we would play on... we pretended all kinds of things on these hills... we were in a war in the desert, on a pirate ship in the sea, in a castle fighting off ogres.. in the winter time when it snowed those dirt hills were our mountains that we went sliding down,hitting bump after bump and knocking the wind out of our chests... I loved those dirt hills.

Behind the dirt hills we had a little trail that went into the clearing... some of the boys made a fort in the big tree in the center and we would go around getting furniture and odds-n-ends from peoples trash to make it our own..you couldn't tell us nothing, our little fort/tree house was the best thing ever! As the trail continued it went off deeper into the woods... at one point there was this abandoned yellow car off to the right... it was a big deal to go near it, it meant you weren't afraid.. of course we had a few stories of how that car ended up back there, most involved murder and bad things happening to girls who didn't listen to their parents.. continuing on the trail it got narrow and led to this lake with another set of woods.. rarely would you see us in the woods at night... stories of little creatures with red beady eyes floated around and none of us were quite brave enough to find out if the stories were true... lol

When you couldn't find me in the woods or on the hills or in the lake or at the creek, you could find me in the fields with the boys playing tag football... as we got older it turned into tackle... I was always bruised up and bleeding somewhere! lol.. fun times...

All that really stopped with me once I turned 13 and became boring.. that was when I started noticing boys in a different manner... than came the cute clothes and lip gloss... making sure my hair looked pretty... no more dirt hills or football...

Sometimes I sit around and remember back to those times and think of the friends I had and all the memories we made.. I wish I had stayed a tomboy a bit longer... man do I miss catching "sunnies"...

Imagination =)

When I was younger I use to have a tent for my bed... now the one I had didn't have butterflies on it... more like a cartoon woodsy theme, but here is an example just in case you are not sure what one is:



The other day, my son used a whole bunch of boxes out of the recyclable bin and made himself a "skate park" for his tech deck. In case you're lost, a tech deck is a mini skateboard you play with and do tricks with using your fingers. When I saw what he did, I was so proud!! His imagination is amazing with how he made his "skate park". When I saw it, it also reminded me of my bed tent.

Of course I didn't build my bed tent, it came in a box, but boy did I have an imagination in there. At the foot of my bed, the bed tent had a little mesh window that also had a fabric cloth with velcro so I could "close" the window if I wanted. I was many things in my tent.

Most girls when they are little play that they are princesses. I was one of those girls. I would sometimes play that it was my secret place to get away from all those "peasants" who were annoying me, or I was locked in a tower or dungeon (whichever fit my mood that day) and waiting for my prince to rescue me. (You know you waited for a prince too!! LOL)

Sometimes I would pretend it was my submarine and I was deep in the ocean exploring sharks and sting rays and other sea creatures. Once I even discovered the Loch Ness monster. (I know, Nessi was in a lake, not the ocean, but hey, I was a kid.)

When I would get in trouble and be grounded to my room, I would imagine I was in jail and plead my innocence in my journal by flashlight. And boy was that cell ever so small...no room for a sink or toilet. You know I didn't even have a mirror?!

I spent many days in my tent drawing and coloring...some of my favorite things to do. I would sneak snacks in there and get trouble of course, but it was all worth it. Only certain stuffed animals were worthy enough to be in the tent, the others were put on the shelf. Sometimes I would switch them out, but a few never left it.

I miss my tent... I wonder if they have ones that fit queen sized beds? I don't think the hubster would go for that though. =)