Monday, August 2, 2010

Being a better wife...

I have a book that I absolutely love! It’s called “Created to be his Help Meet”. This book is based around the Bible and God’s view on marriage and how a wife should be. I won’t go into all of it because I know not everyone believes in God, however, there are things in this book that can apply to everyone, believers and non-believers. Here we go!!

Be “sober”.
No, I don’t mean sober as in the opposite of drunk, lol. By “sober” here, I mean more like having common sense. A “sober” wife faces the fact that she is no longer a freewheeling individual who has the time to do whatever she pleases. She realizes that marriage is a partnership and she must consider her husband in all things. It’s no longer all “me, me, me”. As “sober” wives, we can’t be frivolous or flighty. Our responsibility now is to our husband, our home, and our children (for those who have children), and of course your job if you work.
We need to make sure our home runs smoothly. If our homes are in chaos, our marriage will end up in chaos too. Planning, preparing, and scheduling will go a long way in making your home run smoothly. When the house is run smoothly it can eliminate a lot of tension and help the home to be a peaceful place to be in.
Simple things to help with this could be planning your meals for the week, assigning chores to children, doing specific chores on specific days, cooking meals ahead of time and freezing for emergency meals in case something comes up and you don’t have time to cook…. You get the idea.

Some things I have noticed that will set the mood for a better evening when my husband comes home from work may help you too.

Clear up the clutter!! The last thing my husband wants is to come home to toys in his way or things on the counter where he lays his beret and keys
Meeting him at the door with a smile and asking how his day was will go over much better than bombarding him with your problems of the day. Let him come in and get settled before discussing problems and complaining. What man wants to come home to a nagging, complaining wife? Not many. If he is use to coming home to “sugar”, he will be the one at work saying, “I can’t wait to go home to my wife!”

Love your husband. Ever since I was a teenager I have believed that women were made to be with men. Either by God or something else, I think we were meant to be partners, help meets, to “belong” to someone else (and someone else belong to us).

In loving my husband, I try the best I can to be comforting and to be a blessing to him. Encouraging him in his career and supporting him 100%.
One of the most important ways in showing love is sex. I don’t care what anyone says to me. Sex is a big part of marriage and if you’re marriage is lacking in this area, you are going to have problems sooner or later.

I always give it to my husband when he wants it. When I say always, I don’t mean even if I’m sick and puking with a 102 degree fever. I mean in reasonable situations. Even if I’m tired and exhausted I still go to bed and be with him. If we deny them this carnal urge, most men will fill this need else where. Sex is important to our husbands.

Take the time to make yourself attractive for him, initiate sex/foreplay. Even when my husband is deployed I try to do these things. If I know we have a “date” on webcam, I will put on my makeup and make sure my hair is done, even if it’s at midnight!! I will tease him with “dirty” talk or flash him, lol. Keep it interesting and keep him interested even when he is gone!
A main point I’d like to make when it comes to loving my husband is that I aim to please him (just as he does me). Whether it be by sex, how I dress, cleaning the house, making what he wants for dinner, getting his car fixed while he is gone, keeping the kids in line….. part of loving is pleasing. Doing things that are pleasing to our husbands show them we appreciate them and respect their feelings, wants, and needs.

Modesty. Let’s touch on this subject for a minute. We all know there is a proper way to dress and an improper way. It’s great to be sexy for your husband and even for yourself. However, being sexy and being trashy are often confused.
I can’t say how many times I have gone to get my kids from school or gone up to the shoppette and saw some trashy women. It’s so disgraceful to yourself and to your husband.

Married women do not need to be going around with shorts up so high that half their ass cheeks are hanging out and shirts so low cut you can their nipple rings if they have them. The way we are reflects on our husbands and that means a lot in the Army.
What does it really say about you if you dress trashy? When I was single, I would wear more provocative things because I was looking for the attention of men. Now that I am married, the only man’s attention I need is my husbands. How does your husband really feel about it? Do you think that a man who is deployed, who knows his wife dresses properly, has more faith in her than a man who knows his wife shows her goods to the world? One sure way to invoke jealousy in your husband is to dress like a skank. Jealousy is not a good thing.

Well, I suppose that will be all for now with this post….maybe I’ll do some more another time. =)


  1. I love this post & agree mostly with everything you wrote. Dressing properly, married or not, in my opinion, is about respecting yourself first. This type thing can be taught to your children at a young age & we can stop the insanity with this generation! My husband doesn't ever get denied physical pleasure. We both enjoy being with each other and I am never too tired to enjoy him. I too have known from a very young age that I was meant to be a partner. The cleaning up the clutter is something I strive to get better on daily. It isn't my strong suit. Just as my husband has some things he is better at than others, so do I. We are both a work in progress. But we are in love and we love each other. Those are two separate things.

  2. I agree 100% It is about time someone said something like this.

  3. glad some others see it how i do lol