* Communicate. Make efforts to write,
call, and e-mail each other. Try to
discuss feelings as well as events. Be
honest. It may help to keep a journal.
Involve the kids in this process as well.
* Get connected. Keep in contact with
friends and other spouses in the unit.
Participate in the unit FRG. Volunteer
and keep active. Don’t do it alone!
* Maintain Routines. You may need
different routines than what you had
before, but routine helps pass the time
and provides stability for children.
* Financial Planning. Without a plan,
things can get out of control. Have a
financial plan that includes savings for
R & R and reunion trips, and stick to
your plan! Be sure your expectations fit
within your budget.
* Go easy on expectations. This is a very
stressful time for everyone. Recognize and
praise each person’s efforts and
accomplishments, and don’t dwell on
* Stay busy. Soldiers stay focused on the
mission. Not only will this help keep you
and your buddies stay safe, it also helps the
time pass more quickly. Spouses can
volunteer or get involved in activities that
help pass the time.
* Relax and Unwind. Every person has his
or her own way to relax and unwind: go to
Starbucks, work out at the gym, listen to
music, read, sports, movies, etc. Even
downrange, make efforts to relax and
maintain balance in your life.
* Reject Rumors. It is rarely helpful or
healthy to believe or repeat unfounded
information from uncertain sources. If you
hear a rumor about your loved one, assume
it is false! Then ask your spouse directly to
get the truth.
* Seek help when needed. The unit Rear D
and the FRG are there for assistance.
Installation agencies can also help. For
soldiers, unit leaders, chaplains, and mental
health professionals will help.
* Keep others informed. Notify the Rear D,
school, FRG, or friend of plans or trips away
from your home. Be reachable.
* Plan for emergencies – Know the Red
Cross system. Even if you don’t need it,
you may help a friend.